the flowers will grow tomorrow.

summer's gone, now winter's on its way
  i will miss the days we had
the days we had
  i will miss the days we had
the days we had
oh, i'll miss the days we had

winter song; the head and the heart

while we are not quite at winter, my summer days are nearing an end. i am heading back to indiana this weekend. i will spend two weeks re-training for my resident assistant job in beckett east at iwu. the next week my "little" freshies will move in. i don't even know their names but am excited to learn their stories. after that we start school. [i felt kind of gross writing that.]

i have been looking forward to going back to school for about a month now. but before that month, i wasn't ready. i didn't want to go back. at. all. there were little hurts that made me want to scream, "i'm not coming back!" really loudly from alaska [loud enough for indiana to hear]. so needless to say, i would have been perfectly happy to have never gone back. if someone had said "bethany, i will give you a donut not to go back." i would have said, "heck yes give me that donut." and not not gone back. heck, i would have taken a half of a donut.

but this summer has been a growing period. growing isn't really the funnest thing you could do but probably it is worth it. i spent multiple mondays at my mentor julie's home. we read the Bible, laughed, cried, drank sweet tea and ya know...i loved it. i spent multiple monday nights at my home with a group of young ladies talking about life and learning how to say yes to God...and ya know i loved it. so pretty much mondays rocked my world. these were the sweetest moments of summer and i am going to miss them.

when you learn positive things you learn to let go of negative things. so that is why i am excited to go back to school. because the positive things give me strength. and that strength [which is really just my love for Jesus] gives me a new perspective.

of course i [probably] won't always have this great perspective. i will likely forget and listen to satan's little whispers. but it is progress not perfection. julie would always say "we are blossoming today. the flowers will grow tomorrow." so that is my new perspective. blossoms are a sign of growth and the beauty that is and is to come. but they don't just appear. it takes some time and love.

so, if someone offered me a donut to not go back to indiana...i would grab the donut and run. indiana, i'll see you soon.

 

- B